youusedme:

Steve continued to shake his head in disagreement,
and right after he’d pulled away she grabbed him.
Needless to say, he wasn’t comfortable with it, the girl
clinging to him was encouraging him to let Tony go and
that was something he couldn’t do that easily, not after
years of friendship. 

It was a bad situation; he wanted to pull back because he
was angry, but the Captain in him was urging him to help
her and that she was a grieving partner. Perhaps jealousy
was skewing his perception but reluctantly he raised a hand
and gave her a very ghostly pat on the back, turning his
head to face Tony. “Just give him support. He shouldn’t be
told to let go, he’s a fighter.” 

It was probably due to seeing him suffering. Maybe it was from
exhaustion, but Ru herself would never want to have Tony let go.
She wanted the both of them to grow old together. Have children.
Watch them grow up. See their grandchildren. Stuff that couples
usually did. But now… It was looking unlikely that would happen.
Ru always thought Tony would have outlived her. Or whatever
a greater power had in store for for the both of them.

Realizing that she was still clinging to him, Ru pulled away,
nodding. “Sorry,” she whispered gently. But what was she truly
sorry for? She had no idea. Was it for clinging to  him for too
long? Or was it for basically giving up on her dying boyfriend?
She did not know. Eventually thought, she sat down next to Tony
and grasped onto his cold hand, rubbing it to try and keep him
warm. “Tony… if you can hear me, Steve’s here… Maybe you can
wake up and say hi?” she mumbled quietly, hoping that Tony
would at least open his eyes.

But there was no movement. Just Tony’s chest moving up and
down from the respirator and the soft beeping from the heart monitor.
“Tony…”

youusedme:

“So he’s not hurting?!” Steve felt like throwing something
at that moment in time. He thought it was strangely ironic
how someone with the name ‘Invincible Iron Man’ was now
on a bed in front of him, dying, with someone who cared for
him saying that it was fine for him to let go. Tony wouldn’t
allow Steve to do that, to let go, so why should he grant
Tony that? It wasn’t a matter of ‘he’d be better off’, it was
taking the easy road that Steve was against. He shook his
head with anger and pulled himself away. 

“No girl of his should ever allow him to let go, Tony has
never taken the easy road and this is no exception to the rule.
Sometimes pain makes us stronger, perceiverence too. If
you give up on him like that, it gives him the right to give up
completely - don’t ever give up on him.” 

"I’m not saying that he isn’t! I’m saying that he /is/,” Rumiko
stated sadly, her eyes bloodshot from crying. She didn’t
want to fight. Not over Tony. They shouldn’t even be fighting
in his presence or even in the hospital at all. But it was a lot
better to just… let him go instead of watching him suffer.
Ru just broke down again at Steve’s words.

It wasn’t even that soft crying either. Rumiko was hiccuping
and sobbing. Her cheeks were tear stained and she just rushed
into Steve’s arms, clinging to him for life. “I hate to see him
suffer, Steve… I just want him to be okay. That’s it.” Her fists
stayed clenched to his shirt, her face buried into his chest.
“I’m so sorry…” she mumbled out, her body shaking as she
cried even more.

youusedme:

His jaw clenched when he heard her give him permission
to let go. He was a believer in fighting, fighting even when
things got tough. He knew Tony had fought, battled and
won over worst demons in the past and all he asked was
for that to continue. He couldn’t stand to see him like this.

Steve could feel his heart strings being tugged at with immense pull. 

“No, Tony, don’t give up.” He found himself saying of his
own accord. “You can fight this, you can.” He had to bite
his last words after there was a hitch in his breath. He
couldn’t watch someone he cared so much about slip
away before he had the chance to confess to him. 

Rumiko just stared at Steve after his outburst. Her face
contorting to show the anger and just… all of the feelings
she had bottled up, had exploded out. “You don’t want him
to give up? /You/ don’t want /him/ to give up?!” she shouted.
“Steve, he’s dying! You want him to continue fighting
this? He’s in pain! He shouldn’t stick around because of us.
It’s his body’s decision. Not yours.”

She stopped and closed her eyes, crying even more now.

“He was going to propose, Steve. /Propose/! And now look at
him! He’s barely hanging on as it is!” Ru yelled through her tears.
She couldn’t help it. “Tony needs to let go so he’s not hurting
anymore!”

youusedme:

For that moment he was forced to turn his head away
to try and gather his composure. He had watched his
friends before, in fact Arnie’s death was still fresh to
him, and it was because of him being in a hospital too.
Hospitals weren’t exactly Steve’s favourite place. He
tried to keep that smile on his face to at least help
reassure the woman in front of him that was thanking
him for being there but it was difficult – when he could
feel his heart forcing itself to pulse, and with every beat
there was pain, a dull drum that sent pain throughout
his chest every time he heard the chime of the monitor
or caught Tony’s pale complexion in the reflection of the
window. “There’s no need to thank me, I just want him to
get better. He means a lot to me…” He muttered that last
part, maybe it was a bit of a secret how much Steve cared
but now he was kicking himself for hiding it for so long.
Now it was too late. 

She shakily glanced over to Tony’s body. The way
he just laid in the bed. He looked like he was just
peacefully sleeping. Wiping her face with the back
of her hand, she quietly pulled away from Steve,
her hands grabbing Tony’s bony ones. “He… hasn’t
been eating,” she said quietly, knowing that he was not
even awake to eat and put more weight on his body. A
weak laugh escaped her lips. Lips that did not have any
shade of lipstick on. Even her eyes did not have any type
of make-up on. Kissing his hand, she started to cry again.
“Tony, you can let go if you want… Don’t torture yourself
for my sake. Or Steve’s. Think about what you want…for
once in your life.”

youusedme:

“Because I have to. The darker we look at situations,
the darker the road looks… We have to take the path
of light, we have to follow what brings us hope and
support because if we fall into that darkness it becomes
harder to climb out of.” He inhaled deeply, exhaling
smoothly to calm his rising nerves. His arm rest around
her to comfort her while his eyes remained fixated on
the man on the bed, laying there, cold and pale. Each
beep the machine made caused his heart to sink. 

"You’re definitely a lucky man for being able to
to do that, Steve. I mean… I wish I can see the
good in everything, just like you can.” She laughed
bitterly and glanced over to Tony, his eyes still
closed, a respirator helping him breathe. “I just…
I love him so much, Steve. I want him to wake up
and smile. God, I miss his smile. That was…always
the highlight of my day, ya know?” A weak smile
appeared on her features as she looked up to Steve.
“He’d be happy knowing you stopped by. You are
a very good friend of his anyways. So, I thank you
personally.”

youusedme:

He couldn’t imagine what she was going through,
watching him like that, being utterly helpless in that
state - but he did know, but to hear that she loved
him so much that she didn’t know how she would l
ive… It made him wonder; how would he live without him? 

           The thought hadn’t crossed his mind because he
           was so sure he wouldn’t live without him. 

He stepped toward her, placing a gentle hand to
her shoulder, but not to be imposing rather,
for comfort. “He’ll make it through, he has to.
For you, for the both of us, for his friends back home…” 

Once his hand made contact with her body, she stopped shaking. Her breathing was uneven, however. She just glanced up towards the tall blond male, her eyes red from crying. “You are such an optimist…” she muttered. After speaking, her face made its way back to his shoulder, but now, she was clinging to him. For some kind of comfort. He was warm. Warmer than how things have been feeling for the past few weeks, since Tony found out he was sick. “How do you see the good in this?”

youusedme:

She was wrong, he was there - he always kept
an eye out, maybe not strictly by Tony’s side but
attempts at getting peeks when he could without
distracting the attention of others. His jaw clenched
and rolled at little, but he tried to play it off as though
it were nothing when he could quite obviously continually
feel the swelling in his chest.

              Tony had said the exact same thing though;
              she was the one for him. Painful, bittersweet,
              but true as it was. He smiled sadly. “I’m sure
              he was the one, and still is. He loved you more
              than you knew, I’m sure… The way he spoke
              about you to me, you know, we’d talk most nights
              over the phone and you were the subject of most
              conversations; what he was going to get you or
              where he was taking you, how much he loved you..”  

Rumiko couldn’t hold it in anymore. The tears were streaming down her face, as Steve spoke to her. Her breath hitched in her throat, as started to do the mixture of hiccuping, trying to take in a full breath of air, and crying. “Steve…” she paused, trying to recompose herself, but ultimately she was failing. All she can really do was release Tony’s hand and just curl up place her head onto Steve’s shoulder. Her body now shaking from her sobs.

“I-I can’t…l-live without him, S-Steve…”